A failed experiment to stop crying

Have you ever cried for enough time that you realize the amount of time you’ve been crying? That happened to me today. I cried for so long that I looked at the clock, did the math and thought, “oh my God why can’t I stop crying?” *Note: it took longer than expected to do the math on how long the crying fit had gone on. Turns out it is nearly impossible to do math whilst crazy upset and crying. I don’t suggest trying this out to test my theory so just take my word for it. *

This is when I decided to try an experiment to end the water works.

I realized how long I’d been crying, and I decided to just focus on what was making me sad. I was testing another theory. My theory was this: if I focused on the sadness hard enough, all of my crying would come out at once. I tried to look at it like eating bad food. Once you throw it all up… You will feel better.

The test was an epic fail.. This theory was garbage. Once the crying had stopped for a good 30 minutes I did think I had figured out a fail proof way to end the horrendous, puffy eye, water show that was now my face. Glad that my experiment was a success (or so I thought) I proceeded to watch South Park. For those who don’t know about this show… You’re missing out. Hilarious social commentary that shouldn’t ever be taken seriously. But wouldn’t you know it? Even South Park made me cry. How the f can South Park make a person cry?!

I guess sadness and crying just take time to get through. I will continue to look for a way to shorten the duration. If and/or when I come up with a solution to this puffy eye predicament, my readers here will be the first to know. Until then… Good luck my friends and keep a tissue box handy.

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